Playing with the sand
Stood a little boy perplexed,
Seeking a companion hand,
But found his life hexed.
He stood by the river
In his hand holding the sand,
And slowly time slipped the past,
So did the sand through his hands.
He became a man in no time
As the wind blew by the shore,
As the seasons kept on changing
The scent of his existence faded.
He transmuted into an old man,
Holding hands with his grandchild,
He finally understood life,
While he saw his grandchild playing in the sand.
Realizing the little things in life
Was just stored in another form
Like in the sand this time.
As a little girl, I grew up fearless, beaming with hope and desires. I sailed with the wind and dance in the rain. But as time passed, I slipped past my childhood into a world where it was hard to fit in.
The fairytale had instill in me an unrealistic expectation of perfect life. But how can any life be so perfect? My life as a teen was sort of my tussle with the world. But my real challenge was my voice.
Our society always push extroverts; successful people with strong persuading voice. But our society never understood that behind the low quite voice was not a shy girl. But my voice often camouflage my inner personality. It was quit unlike me, who was on the contrary quite jovial. People tell me that they like my voice because it is sweet and pleasant to hear, like raindrops falling on a petal. Such compliments often cheer me up yet after a while it am overpower by feeling of dejection of me being trapped in a room full of people trying to scream but no one can hear me.
Some people are blessed with soft voice. People often extrapolate my habits and characteristics based on my voice. It is surprising I am perceived as docile, quite and reserved girl. On the contrary people discover my opposite traits after getting acquaintance.
Often I record my voice in a tape. I resent my voice to be resembling that of a child. Then I plunged into my seat, taking a deep breadth and thinking bout all the people complaining about their imperfection. I cannot choose to dispense with my imperfection. But I can surely choose to be happy accepting myself with my flaws.
And only sometimes you need to fall in love with your flaws so that you don’t do anything to change it. So this is how I speak, let it be.
I’m soft-spoken, and that’s who I am.
Today I decided to make a little change in my lifestyle. Nothing good has happened anyway so I thought maybe a change could help that. I have so many things planned for the future but I don’t see myself working hard enough to get there. What I am doing today is not enough to take me any closer to where I want to be tomorrow.
So, I am starting this journey with three small steps. My first step is to make a journal. So that I could keep a track on my progress and see if I am making any improvement or not.
Second, I have decided to abandand my comfort zone. I must learn to feel the pressure of getting things done on my own in time. There’s no way I am learning about life living like this.
Third, I am going to make weekly challenges for myself. To boost up my confident and to dominant my fighting spirit. As they say,
If you want something that you never had, you must do something you have never done.
And with this I hope I can sleep today. Hoping tomorrow will be my new day.
I stayed late that night, wishing upon the shooting star to bless me with a dream and let these sleepless night be no more.
As the wind was trying to blow me away
my heavy heart weighed me down.